Uro Club

Reviewed by: Andrew Rabadan
Reviewed on: 6/17/2010 1:38:49 PM

Poor

There was a time, a time not more than three hours ago, that I did not know what a 'uroclub' was. This time was full of unicorns and rainbows, Led Zeppelin had never broken up and the pizza place across town didn't charge for delivery. My innocence is lost now however, the unicorns have died, the rainbows have faded and the pizza guy wants another two-fifty.

The Uroclub is a hollow tube disguised as a golf club that you are supposed to pee into. Yes, for all those times that you just can't hold it, or don't have enough time to take the golf cart back to the country club, or when there arent any porta potty's around, or that you cant find some bushes, the uroclub can help. So, I guess, when you're golfing on the moon the uroclub might come in handy.

Why does the uroclub exist? Seriously, why? I mean in order for this thing to be a product someone, somewhere, must have said 'Gee, I wish I had a golf club to pee into. Man that would be so sweet.' And then that person had to convince an investor or investors that they too should also have golf clubs that they could pee into.

In the commercial you see the guy standing there with a towel wrapped around his front, hands underneath it and the club sticking out. Even if this was three hours ago and I handn't heard of this product, and I had seen that, I still would have thought that the guy was peeing into his golf club.

The uroclub is not an inconspicuous pee-aid for incontinent golfers on the go, its a hollow tube that looks quite obvious when you use it. In fact, I cannot possibly imagine peeing into a plastic tube without at the same time wondering when exactly I hit rock bottom and then going home to my cardboard box to cry my self to sleep and hope someone puts a quarter into my empty coffee cup.

And another thing, who wants to clean this? I mean its not like you can flush it. I don't know about you but i kind of have this aversion to touching things I have just peed into. I really don't think it would be too awesome to carry a pee filled tube around with me all day, in the hot sun, hoping it wont leak onto my stuff. Sure I guess you could just dump it out by a tree, but at that point why dont you just pee into the bushes and cut out this entire awkward step?